Holidays are unwieldy, grinding days for the grieving. And this year is riddled with pain: tens-of-thousands dead, lost jobs and crumpled dreams, ruined relationships, murdered Black bodies. So much loss. We were not made to bear this alone. Take a moment to consider who you know that has encountered loss. Write down their names. Then, reach out with a text or a call. Drop off a plate of food.

Fix-It Frank kills connection at home, at work...everywhere.

Let me give you an example from earlier this week.

What are you doing, as a company, to purposefully reflect and recalibrate as you close out 2020? It is important to acknowledge both the losses of 2020 as well as the hope and vision that will carry your organization into 2021.

Leaders, today is a good day to check in with your people. Because some of them are still riding a wave of joy and relief, of exultation at the first woman (a Black and South Asian woman!) elected on an executive ticket. After four years of tension in the body and spirit, they are (probably) feeling relief and hope.

Now is the time to remind your people of how they can access the EAP program. The next few months will be tough. Flu (and COVID) season is ramping up, election results will probably be a protracted mess, and the holidays will remind us of how much has changed/been lost in 2020. All of this takes a mental toll; your people need all the support they can get!

Empathy is the essential leadership skill of 2020. Empathy is the ability to honor and respond to the pain of another person, the capacity to let that person know that they are seen and heard and that they are not alone.

When this sort of intentional care occurs, it has a profoundly positive effect on businesses, communities, and families. And yet, empathy is a skill that is often under-appreciated and even unpracticed, especially from top leadership.

“Individuals with a higher sense of power experience less compassion and distress when confronted with another’s suffering.” This was the conclusion of an illuminating study by psychologist Gerben A. van Kleef and colleagues in Psychological Science. What does this mean? It means that as you rise in influence, your perception of others will (could) become skewed.

I was eating an omelet when I noticed that her hair looked different. “Did you cut your hair?” I asked my seven year old. Yes. She did. Lopped off a chunk in the front. “It was sticking up so much and bothering me; so I just decided to cut it.” …

Shame is a crappy motivator. Shame can get you short-term results, but in the long term, it demeans your people and undercuts your authority. Communicating boundaries and expectations (no pigs in the briefing packet!) with trust shows confident, caring leadership.

Mental health matters in your workplace.  It is one of the most important factors identified in Springbuk’s Employee Health Trends 2020 Report.  Nearly 1 in 5 employees have a mental health condition. 

Mental health issues take a toll on productivity and presence…and they are expensive.  Claims for medical and prescriptions are more than twice what it costs for those without a mental health condition.

News outlets and social media feeds are full of pain today over the tragic loss of Kobe Bryant and the eight others who died yesterday morning. We are signaling our pain, our awareness of loss, through quotes and photos.

Attentive listening is powerful…and difficult.  Whether you are a manager, a parent, a co-worker, or just a human being, an important first step to helping someone in pain is to pause, pay attention, and listen.